Being single can be tough, especially when you feel alone. In spite of trying to be content in our singleness, it’s easy to feel discouraged when you’re longing for marriage and it seems far off or out of reach. I get it, girl, and that’s exactly why I’m here to offer you some reassurance and encouragement.

Trust God

While I believe in taking action (like putting yourself out there and going on dates) because faith without works is dead, you must also trust that God cares about every detail of your life, including this one. This isn’t a surprise to Him. As you do your part, ask Him to order your steps. Trust His timing, even when it’s hard.

Guard Your Heart

Can I be real for a second? A lot of my frustration with failed talking stages came from not guarding my heart. The heart represents our emotions, thoughts, and spiritual life. It’s where decisions are made, faith is nurtured, and relationships—both with God and others—are formed. Be mindful of what you’re feeding your heart. Watch out for the content you consume, lustful or fantasizing thoughts, and the conversations you entertain. Let God’s Word shape how you view this season of singleness.

Be Part of a Community

Community has been a game-changer for me, not just in my walk with Christ but also in my singleness. Surround yourself with women you can connect with and learn from, whether single or married. A healthy community keeps you grounded, holds you accountable, and reminds you that marriage isn’t the ultimate goal; heaven is.

Know Your Worth and Value

Being single doesn’t make you less worthy or mean God views you as ‘less than.’ Your worth isn’t tied to your relationship status but rooted in Christ, who loves you deeply and has a plan for your life. Embrace your identity in Him and know that you are already enough.

Don’t Idolize Relationships

It’s natural and God-given to desire a relationship, but there’s a fine line between desiring and idolizing. When you trust God’s timing, you’re desiring. When you put a relationship above Him, you’re idolizing.

Idolatry can lead you to compromise your values, “cheat your way” into things, or take shortcuts that don’t honor God. It’s self-centered and often reveals itself through your actions. Check your heart. Are you seeking fulfillment in God first?

Don’t Lower Your Standards

“This is why so many Christians are still single in their 40s,” a man once told me when I said I wouldn’t have sex before marriage.

As Christians, our standards should align with God’s Word, not the world’s. Don’t lower your standards to fit in; stand firm in what you believe.

Have Boundaries

Your boundaries reflect how you view yourself. Learn your worth and identity in Christ, and your boundaries will follow. The Bible tells us that our bodies are temples of the Lord and that we should offer them as living sacrifices. This means living in a way that honors God not only in how we treat ourselves but also in how we allow others to treat us.

You don’t have to entertain everyone in the name of dating or desiring marriage.

Get to Know Yourself

One of my secrets to better relationships of all kinds,? Knowing myself. When you understand your likes, dislikes, pet peeves, and even your own red flags, you’re better equipped to identify what works for you.

This isn’t just about dating. It’s about personal growth. When you know yourself deeply, you can care for yourself better, physically and emotionally.

For more guidance, check out my guided journal to help singles navigate this season and grow in self-awareness.

Be Patient with Yourself

In Christian circles, marriage is often idolized, while singleness can be demonized. This pressure can make us think something is wrong with us, but that’s not true. Both singleness and marriage are beautiful and can glorify God.

As a single Christian woman, take back your mental power. Renew your mind with God’s Word, and let Him show you how to thrive in this season.

Desiring Intimacy Is Normal

This can feel taboo, and for that reason, I feel like it needed its own point. Let me wrap up by reminding you that desiring marriage and a deep romantic connection is normal.

God is an intimate God. He created you for intimacy—with Him and with others. You’re not alone in your longing. Trust that your desire for love and companionship was designed by the God who wouldn’t have created it if it weren’t for your good and His glory.

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Alright, girl, go out there and be great. I hope you leave this blog feeling more encouraged than when you came. Remember, you’re not alone, not ‘less than,’ and definitely not forgotten. For more blogs related to single women, check out my other posts [here].”